I don't.

7.05.2012

It seems that I have come to the point in my life where every single person I know is getting married. My ex-boyfriends and 63.25% of the people I went to high school are currently married or engaged to be married. When did we all get so old?



Marriage is not something that I take lightly. When I get married, I want that to be it. No divorce. No calling it quits. It has nothing to do with religion or the Bible. I consider wedding vows to be sacred in their own way. To me, when you commit your life to somebody in front of your family and friends, that means something. You do everything in your power to make it work. That is my plan. I will fight for my marriage, through the good and the bad, because I made a promise to do so.




Maybe that is why the mere idea of being married freaks me out. When I think about being with another person for the rest of my life, I get the sudden urge to curl up in the fetal position. I doubt this is normal, since most of the people I know have already tied the knot. Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to know, with unfaltering certainty, that another person is the one for me. Forever. You know, every single day until death do us part.




Now, I also suffer from what I call "family syndrome". There are certain times when I feel uncontrollable urges to have a family. When you have a child, I think it is kind of inevitable to want that for yourself and your little one. There is no doubt about it that having a family is usually easier than doing it on your own: financially, emotionally, physically. Sometimes I just wish that there was another adult around to help maintain my sanity.




But at the end of the day, I know that I am not ready to make the kind of commitment that being married entails. Nor do I see it happening any time soon. Sure, the perks of having a husband would be fantastic. Somebody to take out the garbage, give me foot massages, cook me breakfast in bed every Mother's Day, remind me to do things like change my oil or pay the electric bill, opening stubborn jars. Count me in on all of the above! I just don't think I am ready to be somebody's wife yet.




Not that I am even dating at the moment!

3 Responses to “I don't.”

  1. I actually feel like I'm at the point where I want to be with one person for the rest of my life. I've always taken relationships seriously so I guess you can say I've had a lot of "practice." LOL. I catch myself thinking about marriage and family life often..especially when my children and I are out at public events. I feel like that's the only thing that I'm missing at this point, but I'm being patient.

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  2. I know exactly what you mean! It seems impossible to not have those "family" urges when you are around other happy families. Mostly, I want to be able to give that to my son. But at the same time, I know that I couldn't make the promise of forever right now. Everybody is different. though! My grandparents got married when they were extremely young, had children when they were young, and have been together for 65+ years with 16 children. That is the type of marriage I hope that I end up in. Minus 16 kids! LOL. We both just gotta be patient and wait for Prince Charming to come along.

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  3. don't be in a hurry, baby... some parts of it sound nice, maybe even glamorous... but when you get past the honeymoon stage, life happens. Now this is not to say, in any way, that people shouldn't jump in and just do it. I know, from my own experience, that it's so EASY to fall in love with the idea of being in love. Ask yourself what it is you're looking for, and later - what it is you've really found. And ask your heavenly Father to bring you a man who deserves your heart, and who shares the same values, and you can TALK to... that will be SO important as you get older. Someone you really ENJOY being with, no matter what else is going in your life(s) at the time. and know that many people are praying for you to find just that... including me :-)

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